So today we went to Mindy's house to hang with the Tulbert - Federick clan, and swim. We had tons of fun!! Mo grilled burgers, I held precious Brady for a good while (man that baby is adorable!!), we all chatted and sat around being lazy together, and the kids swam for a good while and played together. We really had a great time. Especially Madelyn and Alex...
Madelyn and Alex were "caught" K-I-S-S-I-N-G. Well, actually Madelyn told on herself so I guess they weren't exactly caught. Madelyn said she kissed Alex on the cheek, and when I told her I thought she was a little young to be kissing boys, she replied with a very logical - "Well I liked it, and he liked it". (Some thought for future pondering: Is Daddy proud of his "mini-Trey" with her logical answer when it involves her kissing a boy?!) What do you say to that?? I didn't really know what to say, so I just gave it my best - well I still don't think you need to be kissing boys yet.
So then I was talking to Jennifer and Madelyn keeps saying in the background - tell mommy I kissed Alex on the cheek 4 times. I'm thinking - oh no - I'm not being the bearer of that news. It's bad enough I have to tell her dad, I don't want to have to tell her mom too! If there are 4 parents making a united front against this - does that give us a better chance of handling it well? I thought we'd have more time to figure this one out... I guess when we got the most talented, intelligent, advanced girl in the class - it meant not just in brains and wit, but in life too?!
So all of you that are reading this who have "been there, done that" - any advice? And those of you that are laughing at us because you're not there yet - just wait until it's your turn!
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Jasa Broadcast
9 years ago
2 comments:
Ok well I am laughing my a** off. Been there, done that you say. Ihate to break it to you but in Kindergartin you still did not like boys. So good luck with that!!
That being said if I was in your shoes.....Well we liked it does not make things right. There is still time and place for things. I would think that needs to be explained before the time comes when it is something more. So if a thirteen year old say she had sex and liked it does that make it ok? I think not. So I suppose kissing on the cheek is not such a big deal but the idea behind it is. I don't really have any words of wisdom on explaning it to her except things just come with age and kissing is one of them. Goes along with being old enough to stay alone or going to the mall with friends. Some things just come with age. Like it or not.
There is this old lady's advice. In the meantime you gotta know I am cracking up and very grateful I am the Bubbe in all of this.
Whatever you do, you can't make her feel ashamed of the kissing...it will scar her for life. This is from the principal/teacher/person who studied a LOT of child development in college a hundred years ago. The bigger of a deal you make of it, the worse it is going to get. I suggest a discussion about personal space maybe, or about kissing being something you wait to do until you're older...something that doesn't make her little kiss on the cheek or her feelings behind the kiss a bad thing, but that gives her a context in which she can think about it differently.
No kids of my own on which to base my thoughts, just the hundreds of kids who have passed through my life professionally. :)
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